Seriously.  No kidding.   I won an igloo (I know you are desperately fighting off jealousy right now…but please try to be happy for me!) 🙂  It happened this last Thursday night…the evening before the last day of my kids Vacation Bible School.  Now, I have to tell you…I never win a thing.  I’m good at the “I’m happy for you…you won a Disney cruise…again!” face because I’ve had to do it so many times!  When I was 22, I won a motor coach tour to Laughlin, Nevada once…but somehow, that didn’t quite feel like a “win” to me.

Each year, the church invites all of us parents to come and listen to our kids sing songs followed by an outdoor party afterwards.  You know…root beer floats, dunk tank, popcorn, games…its a ton of fun!  Well, this year they added something new.  A raffle!!  We entered the building and were handed a raffle ticket right before going underneath this enormous white tent (the theme was Mt. Everest…snow, ice, polar bears…the whole thing).  We sat down in the sanctuary, enjoyed the program, and then the raffle began!

They raffled off tote bags, t-shirts, a huge stuffed bear, several really colorful kid tents (I wanted one of those!), and other things that they had used that week, but probably didn’t want to have to store.  Then the final and “grand prize” was announced.  “Our next prize is an igloo!!!”  Now, somehow, I knew I was going to “win” the igloo.  I don’t know why I knew it…maybe it just felt like a “Laughlin, Nevada motor coach tour prize”…I wanted one of those colorful tents…but then I pictured that huge white tent we had all walked through to get into the sanctuary, and my heart skipped a little beat!  That would be so fun to set up for the kids in the back yard!!  That must be the igloo!!! It’s so big, it could be the “guest bedroom” I’ve always wanted for our home!!  The next thing I knew, they had called my number and I jumped up (yes, I did!), and with arms up, I exclaimed, “Igloo Winner!!”

Don’t laugh at me, but when they showed me what the “igloo” REALLY was, I wanted to cry.  The true igloo “prize” was on the other side of the patio outside.  It was constructed out of 200 empty milk gallon jugs that were hot glue gunned together to make an igloo.  Yikes!??  THAT?  That is what I have to…I mean “get to” bring home?!  Oh no!!  Finding the woman in charge after the party, I tried to politely get out of it…but my kids were pleading for the igloo!! I said, “We can’t fit that in our car!”  She said, “That’s okay, our custodian will bring it to your house!”  I said, “Oh, that’s so sweet of him to do that for us, but we live 45 minutes away!” She said, “Perfect!  He lives in the same town as you!!”  Ugh!  I could not undo this igloo winning thing!!  I finally said, “Well, let me think about it overnight and I’l let you know tomorrow.”  She was happy with that.

I was torn. My kids wanted the igloo.  I knew, however, that in 10 minutes in our backyard, my kids would topple the igloo. It would be broken apart and I would have to collect millions of milk jugs, cram them into my car, and get them to recycling!! I pictured my car full of milk jugs while I tried to see through my back windows and drive safely.  No.  I would have to tell them in the morning that we couldn’t accept this lovely and generous gift.

In the morning, however, I dropped off the kids for their last day, and hustled back to my car trying to draw the least amount of attention to myself.  I wanted to avoid anyone who might know anything about my igloo winning.  Why did I have to jump up and yell, “Igloo Winner” for?!  I was hoping they would just forget about it, and we would drive away igloo-free!  But at pick up, the woman in charge found me and gave me the news.

“We are so sorry, Tami…” she began. “…the igloo was destroyed by some boys today who climbed on top of it!!  We feel so bad about them ruining your prize.  Instead, we’d like to give you one of those colorful tents…”

I tried to hide my excitement.  “Oh…darn…well, okay.  Sure.  We’d love a tent.  Thank you so much!  You really don’t have to give us anything…” Outwardly, I tried to look humble and gracious, but on the inside I was squealing with delight!!  A tent!!  I won a colorful tent!!  I will have to find those boys and thank them later! 🙂

I’m just thinking of Romans 8:28 today!  “And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to His purpose for them.” 🙂   He turned my igloo into a tent!!!   He cares about the little things too…

Last September, I came down with a horrible sickness…it turned out to be an enterovirus (but I did not know that’s what it was until it was over).  I had medical tests done, and was told I was fine, but for three long months, I could hardly eat anything without it upsetting my entire digestive tract.  I lost fifteen pounds because all I was eating was bananas, applesauce, rice…and whatever gluten free crackers and yogurts I could manage.  Along with the sickness came fear, frustration, anxiety, and even depression…I just couldn’t get over this thing…and the not knowing what it was, made me SO afraid!  I hosted Thanksgiving and couldn’t even eat any of what I had made!!  There were MANY tears…and lots of prayers from those who I confided in.  Everything in me was telling me to trust God…that He would come through.  I remembered all that He’d gotten me through in the past, but I felt like I was in a dark hole and I couldn’t get out. “God, what is going on???” I would cry.

Then one night, God answered.

He gave me a dream.  Not just any dream, it was a dream that has since changed my life.  I dreamt I came home to my house one evening and my Christmas tree had been stolen!  A dark enemy had come in an open window, grabbed hold of my tree (with ornaments and all), dragged it out the window, and taken off with it.  I was devastated and felt violated in the dream.  Someone had been in my home!!  It was bright inside my home and dark outside…so I knew I was being watched from the outside.  So creepy!! AND get this: this thief had the audacity to write me a note and leave it where the tree once stood.  In scratchy handwriting it said, “YOU THANK GOD TOO MUCH.”  Seriously?

But the me in my dream was awesome!  I would love to be more like her!! 🙂   I loved what I did!  Instead of being afraid, because I knew the enemy was lurking outside watching what I would do, I ran over to my fireplace mantle where my music player was, and put on some praise and worship music.  I then began to twirl around the room and sing songs…loud worship love songs to Jesus!!!  It was as if I was slapping that enemy right in the face!  It was as if I was saying, “Thank God too much, you say??  Okay enemy… that’s pretty lame to take my tree…now I’ll thank God all the more!”

I woke up and knew exactly what God was saying.  God was reminding me that I have an enemy who was trying to steal my joy!!  1 Peter 5:8 says, “Stay alert!  Watch out for your great enemy, the devil.  He prowls around like a roaring lion, looking for someone to devour.” He’s mad because I’m “thanking God too much” apparently.  It all became instantly clear…I’m in a battle!  “Okay.  I get it now.”  In one simple dream, God gave me my “battle plan”…and that was to worship Jesus.

Get this:  When Paul and Silas were beaten up, and then imprisoned for telling people about the love of Jesus (Acts 16:23) they did the coolest thing ever!  They worshiped God in their prison cell!  Instantly there was a massive earthquake, their chains fell off, the doors flew open, and they were set free!

I love to dance.  I love to sing.  I love to worship Jesus with everything in me…and this was my beautiful ticket to freedom!  I hadn’t been doing ANY of this while in my “hole”.  I’m ashamed to admit that I was too busy whining, complaining, accusing God, and feeling sorry for myself.  From that dream on, (and it wasn’t always easy because I was feeling so icky), every chance I got, I began to worship Jesus!  I knew I was slapping that enemy in the face, and that brought the biggest smile to my face!!  You know what happened?  I got well.  It was a slow process…but a process in the right direction, and more than that, my joy was restored!  I was finally set free!

My pastor spoke today on “standing” in battle, and how sometimes, it’s not about gaining ground, it’s about standing when the battle is raging around you, and not retreating.  Standing is a victory in and of itself.  Since then, I will tell you that I worship God a lot more.  I thank Him a lot more too.  I am determined to stand whenever necessary.  I fail a lot (A LOT), but I am more aware of what’s really going on around me. There’s a battle for my soul…but I know Who’s I am…and He’s already won the war. 🙂

Project Sleeping Bag is complete…and I’m wiped out!  What is “project sleeping bag” you ask?  Just something that took not only most of my day, it took off the calories from my Starbucks butter croissant (I’m hoping anyway), and 96 quarters.  96 quarters!!! (That’s $24.00 in case you’re wondering!)  All of this because of two little visitors…

A little over a month ago, we had two little mice that decided to make their new permanent place of residence OUR GARAGE! Ugh!!  I came home one evening, and while unlocking the door that leads from our garage to our house, I heard “crunching” sounds coming from the shelving right next to my head!  Without giving too many horrid details…we will fast forward in time and just say those two little mice have since “moved on” to greener pastures (thank you, Hubby!! Your’e my hero!) Oh! Guess where their little “nesting spot” was…my box of Christmas ornaments!!!  Grrrr….

Our sleeping bags are kept in the garage not far away from that box.  Uncertain as to whether those pesky mice left any “traces” of themselves on them (so gross, I know!  I’m wondering why I’m blogging about this too!), I decided to take all five of our sleeping bags to those enormous washers/dryers at the laundromat for a good cleaning.

I don’t know much about OUR sleeping bags, except for the fact that they are huge and extremely puffy…and I’m convinced they would keep us absolutely warm and toasty if/when we ever decide to climb Mt. Everest!  It’s been a hundred years since I’ve been to a laundromat, so needless to say I was a bit shocked to find out how  much it would cost me.  By the end (you know, 96 quarters later), I headed home for the daunting task that lay ahead of me…  “Stuffing the huge sleeping bags into their itty bitty covers”. You know what I’m talking about.  Please tell me you’ve been there!  Why do they make the covers so small???!!!  Hours later? I’m not sure, but with worn out fingers from the stuffing process…this sweat ball (that’s me!) is done.  It should be noted, however, that I would still be stuffing them if it weren’t for the Starbucks latte I had prior to all of this. 🙂  Thank you, Starbucks…you are my hero too!

Silly, I know.  But I did have this thought today: whether it’s conquering puffy sleeping bags, or conquering bigger things like sickness, addiction, or whatever things the enemy of our souls tries to throw our way…I am reminded today that  “In all these things we are more than conquerors through Christ who loved us.” (Romans 8:37).  And mice are cute…just not in my garage. 🙂

It’s summer break and the kids are home…oh goodie? 🙂  Half of me is excited to have a break from the mad morning “get to school on time” rush!  The other half misses the beautiful quiet that came when two of my three would be at school.  Yesterday we all went grocery shopping together, and it felt like I brought a traveling circus along with me for everyone’s entertainment!  I, however, was not entertained.  “And for our next act, three little clowns will do flips from the top of the tiny grocery cart “car” they have all crammed inside of! Peanuts…get your peanuts!!”  I think I also spent more money than I should have just on “stress snacks” for me, and junk to keep my kids happy!!  Ugh!!!

“Super Mom” (that’s me on caffeine!) decided to show up yesterday and create “summer chore charts” for them to do each day.  Today she has left me to deal with the follow up on her “super” idea!  It’s not going so well.  Right now two of my kids are playing with ice instead, while the other one is creating a beauty salon in her room.  Oh goodie!  At least I can get my hair done today!! 🙂

Things don’t always go as planned…and that’s okay.  It’s summer, and it’s supposed to be fun, right?  My Circus performers have a show today at Michael’s craft store (if anyone is interested…tickets go on sale now) while we get stuff for our “let’s make Daddy a super challenging craft for Father’s Day” plan…another one of “Super Mom’s” great ideas!  I think I’ll have some coffee before we leave!  🙂

We just got back from a ten day trip to Yellowstone and the Grand Tetons!  Road trip!! If you’ve ever been to either place, you know that the “thing to do” is to look for wildlife!  Buffalo, bears, moose, elk, big horn sheep…the list goes on.  So it wasn’t surprising that on one particular evening we drove out to the Lamar Valley to see if the wolves would make their anticipated regular appearance. The wolves are special because, once extinct in Yellowstone, they were reintroduced in 1995, and are now making a comeback (I learned that at the Visitor Center! 😉 ).  Binoculars and cameras ready, we sat and we waited for them to come…and we waited…we saw a beaver…and we waited…eating too many pretzel sticks…and we waited, but nothing came.   We soon discovered that pretzels make you thirsty and we drank way too much water in our waiting…it was time to go!! We’d been there so long, so we waited ten more minutes and then decided to leave…each of us a little bummed.

We drove only a few miles when suddenly we were forced to stop.  A huge herd of slowly grazing buffalo were crossing the road in front of us!  Exciting as it was to have them so close to our car…it was annoying to have to wait for them to cross.  I don’t know why I said it, other than it must have been God, I just said, “Well, maybe God is slowing us down for a reason…maybe He has something wonderful up ahead and he doesn’t want us to miss it!  It’s all about His timing!”  A few miles later it happened.  A Mama black bear and her two little cubs had just appeared along the side of the road!  They were so cute!! The only other black bear we had seen on the trip was a far away “dot” on a hill and that was with our binoculars!!  The Mama and her cubs ran in front of our car as cute as could be, the cubs climbed the tree next to us…the whole thing was like an incredible show!! Had we not left when we did, or been slowed down by a herd of buffalo, we would have missed out!  My oldest daughter said it was a miracle! 🙂
How often I don’t see the whole picture!  Sometimes what I want to see isn’t nearly as awesome as what God wants me to see.  God’s out to bless…and His timing is perfect.  If he needs to slow me down with some no-show wolves or a herd of slowly grazing buffalo so I don’t miss out on His blessings, that’s okay by me.

“Even though on the outside it often looks like things are falling apart on us, on the inside, where God is making new life, not a day goes by without His unfolding grace.” 2 Corinthians 4:16-17.

Please don’t judge me. I will admit it: I offered my 8 year old daughter a Hershey chocolate bar if she’d help my son clean his room this morning!  There it is.  “Parent of the Year” title awarded to me!!  But, in my defense,  my son is giving me a run for my money these days.  “He’s four years old,” I tell myself continuously throughout the day…but it’s hard to keep up with him sometimes!

I walked into his room this morning and it looked like someone had picked his room up from the foundation of the house, turned it upside down, and then set it back down again…like a giant snow globe!!!  Only instead of soft, sparkling snow covering the floor, it was covered in toys, clothes, dirty socks and underwear, stuff from his sisters’ rooms and stuff I’m not exactly sure of.  Are those my missing flip flops?  Remember from two blogs ago…I have a difficult time with messes!  We had fifteen minutes before it was time to leave for school, and I was desperate!  That’s when my daughter came in, all ready for school, and with time to spare!  And it hit me…I remembered that chocolate bar in the pantry!!  I pitched my offer to my daughter and she happily agreed to our “chocoate bar deal”!!  She was off and running to help him clean.

I felt guilty though.  Half of me was saying, “Dang.  She did it all herself, while he looked on not learning a thing from this experience…I’m a terrible parent.”  But the other half of me (the one I tend to like a whole lot better) said, “Score, Tami!!  High fives for such a genius plan!!  Chocolate has antioxidants and also aids in digestion…that was healthy for her too!!  Job well done!” 🙂

Maybe not the best start to our day, but I’m learning to have a little grace for myself…especially when it comes to parenting.  My kids are loved and they know it…  and what do I know?   I know I won’t be writing any “Parenting How To” books any time soon!  😉  I am, however, going to add chocolate bars to the grocery list!

Still waters…so peaceful.  When I imagine a perfect place…it looks a lot like this.  It’s lush and green, and the waters aren’t mighty, rushing, and loud.  They are quiet and still.  I also like to imagine that there are no insects or spiders in the grass to contend with (just saying!!!).  It’s a perfect place.

When life gets stressful or hectic, I like to imagine still waters.   Psalm 23:2 says, “He makes me lie down in green pastures; He leads me beside the still waters. He restores my soul;”  His desire is for us to feel His peace…it was HIS idea.  He knows how hard life can be at times…and He’s saying today, “Are you tired?  Worn out?  Burned out on religion?  Come to Me.  Get away with Me and you’ll recover your life.  I’ll show you how to take a real rest…” (Matthew 11:28)