I’ve been thinking a lot lately about how busy I’ve been this summer…and that’s putting it mildly! Honestly, this Mama’s exhausted!  It’s been one activity to the next, and although it’s been FUN stuff…there’s not been any “down time” for this wiped out (FRIED, is more like it!) mom!  It’s my fault really…I overbook us and plan way too much.  I want the kids to have a great summer….and so we try and cram in everything and everyone we can all within 7 fast weeks.  But secretly, I will tell you that I’m thrilled school is starting up soon (9 days and counting!). Then my life can sort of get back to “normal”…or as close as I can get to normal anyway!

Last Thursday night, I left the gym (I’ve been doing a crazy “spin class” several nights a week…), and I basically dropped into my car, “dropped” because spin class leaves my legs trembly and sore…and I began to cry!

But wait!  It’s not as bad as it sounds, really!!  You should know that I cry when I’m tired…just like a baby does.  “Baby Tami is starting to cry!!”  🙂  AND it wasn’t the spin class that made me cry either.  I can be wimpy sometimes, but not THAT wimpy!!  (Okay, sometimes I will admit I come close to crying at spin class…it’s quite a workout!)  But seriously, I was just DONE!

Anyway, I thought the class would be good for me to work off all the stress from the craziness of the week and the stress in all the preparation for upcoming events,  but it left me feeling even more exhausted and just drained, I guess.

Then it hit me.  In all the busy and the crazy non-stop going on around me, I have not been taking time to allow myself to be filled up…at all.  I’m drained and worn out…and now crying like a baby in the gym parking lot!  What’s happening here?!  It was then in the car, I offered up a silent prayer to the One who I know can fill me up like no other, “Jesus…I need You. Fill me up to overflowing as only YOU can…and help me accomplish everything that is overwhelming me right now…”  I’m not kidding when I say that my drive home was different.  I put on music and just allowed the Creator of the Universe to love on me!!  Sounds weird, but I’ve been learning that He LOVES to love on us!!  Crazy, huh?  In this car ride home, it wasn’t about my trying to please Him with my singing or talk His ear off with lengthy prayers or anything…it was just me being quiet and soaking up His affection for me like a sponge.  I came home a new, filled up Mama.  The next morning I remembered this story…

In the book of Matthew (chapter 8), Jesus and His disciples got in a boat.  Suddenly there was a TEMPEST and waves began to crash into the boat!  I love this part…Jesus was sleeping!!!  Can you imagine?  Sleeping through an incredible storm!  He found rest and refreshing in the middle of a storm.  No worry or fear at all.  The disciples were in terror and woke Him up.  He basically says to them, “Why are you afraid?  Where is your faith?” and then He calms the wind and the sea so that everything becomes still.  How cool is THAT?!  I wish I could have been there to see it!!  Sleeping…in a storm!  I want to be like that!! 🙂

Since Thursday, each time I have begun to feel stressed out or tired, I’m trying to imagine myself lying next to Jesus in the boat, heads side by side…either star gazing or sleeping.  🙂  Waves are crashing all around us, disciples are running around panicking nearby…but we’re not worried.  I’m just allowing myself to be filled up with more of Him…to snuggle up in the boat next to the One who made me.  I’m not praying or singing songs to Him in these moments…I am not trying to “accomplish” anything in these moments…it’s really all about floating in a little boat with my very best friend…and letting myself be filled up by His incredible love for me.  Maybe it’s because it’s a personal relationship…and like any close relationship, the love goes both ways.  🙂

“The Lord your God in your midst, The Mighty One, will save;  He will rejoice over you with gladness, He will quiet you with His love, He will rejoice over you with singing.”  Zephaniah 3:17.  I’m telling you, He LOVES to love us!