I’ve been plotting this for years now. Two years to be exact. It’s taken some pretty careful planning on my part. And this week, I did it… I finally did it! What was my mission you ask? Well, it was simple: to get a pear. Yes, you heard me correctly…to get a pear.

Let me explain. We are not just talking about any old pear…it had to be a pear from the pear orchards I run past. It had to be one of these special pears.

You might be thinking, “What’s the big deal with getting a pear from the local pear orchard? Just pick one off the tree, or better yet, buy some at the grocery store…hello-o?” Well, let me explain. You see, I live in a town that was made famous for it’s pear orchards (including this one) back in the day. I’ve lived here my whole life and guess what? I’ve never had one of these beauties because they don’t sell them in the grocery store. PLUS, every September a team of wonderful and happy volunteers comes in droves to pick them ALL and package them up to ship to a local food bank. That’s so awesome, right? These special pears are going to folks who actually need them…and well, I don’t. I’m in the “want one” category. So how can I feel good about taking one from someone who’s hungry? To me, it feels like stealing if I pick one of these pears. See my dilemma? I know…I know… it’s just a pear.

But even MORE crazy is my reason. I don’t just want to eat the pear…I mean, I’d love to know what it tastes like. But more than that… I want to save the seeds so I can plant my own special pear trees! I planted some apple trees from an apple I ate during that awful Covid season back in 2020, and it was such a wonderful feeling to grow something from seed! I’m not much of a gardener, but I think I could be! (I can feel your amazement at my grand ambitions in life even now). So, I’ve had some time to think about this and here’s where my plan finally takes shape.

For the past couple of years I’ve watched all summer long as the pears grow and ripen before they get harvested. The volunteers pick every single pear and there is not one left! Two years ago, my plan was to get one that they maybe left behind…to pick one of those…but alas, there was not a one! Not.a.one. Ugh!

Last year, I thought, well, I will just grab one that’s fallen on the ground so that way, it’s not stealing. I mean, it’s decaying anyway and no one’s going to eat that, so at least I can save the seeds. Genius, right? Well, I was too late, for the harvesters came before I had a chance to do that AND they even cleaned up the ones on the ground!! Why would they do that? I was astonished and sad all at once. So, I decided this year, I had to be ready for that moment. And ready I was!

Last week, I went on my morning run like usual and thought with a confident smile, “This is the day. This is ‘Pear Day’. Today I am getting a pear from the ground and running home with it. It will be half decayed anyway, so I won’t be taking one away from anyone.” As I approached the pear trees, I was alarmed by how many beautiful pears were on the ground starting their decaying process. I thought to myself, “Oh boy! It’s TIME!” Carefully scanning all the pears that had fallen on the ground, I suddenly saw it. There it was…a small green pear on the ground without a single blemish or mark of decay. I was in shock! It must have just fallen two minutes ago and now it was lying right here ready for me to pick up. I reached out my hand, slowly picked it up, and carefully wrapped my fingers around it…it felt good. It was MY pear.

Never mind the fact that several yards away from me was an old lady who had driven her car up, parked at a crooked angle, brought her own apple picker thingy and was loading up pears from one of the trees and bagging them up to take with her. Here I was with my one ground pear. I didn’t care…it was a dream come true.

As I continued on with my run toward home, I was amazed at how many people I knew in town that seemed to be out and about as if to come and watch the “Crazy Pear Lady” running home with her ground pear. I even stopped to talk to a few who glanced at my pear, maybe wondered to themselves, but said nothing. I pretended like it was totally normal. My pear plan was in effect and nothing was going to stop me now. 🙂 I lead an exciting life, don’t I?

I made it home and sat on my front porch step just looking at my treasure. “What is it with me and this silly pear?” I wondered. As I sat there staring at it, I was taken back to something God had spoken to my heart a few weeks earlier about His word being like a living seed in our hearts. It grows when we water it, nurture it, protect it and take care of it. His word is a LIVING thing…just like this pear growing on the pear tree. Hebrews 4:12 says “For the word of God is alive and active…” God even says in Isaiah 55 that “just as rain and snow descend from the skies and don’t go back until they’ve watered the earth, making things grow and blossom, producing seed for farmers and food for the hungry, so will the words that come out of My mouth (God’s mouth) not come back empty handed. They’ll do the work I (God) sent them to do.” In other words, God’s word accomplishes what He wants it to do.

So, if God’s word says that He has good plans for my life (like it says in Jeremiah 29:11) then, yes, God’s word is alive and true and He has good plans for my life. I’m going to nurture that word, and watch it grow. Just like my pear seeds.

I never know when God is going to speak something special to me…but on this day, it was through a little green pear. How sweet!

I love teaching Kindergarten. I have been blessed to teach five and six year olds, and with that, comes a lot of sweetness, laughter, dancing, learning about bugs and trees, reading of books, and a vast amount of great stories to share! I get to teach them SO SO many things, among those being how to read, how to count, and my absolute favorite…how to write. They learn their letters and sounds and from there, they learn how to take those letter sounds and form words. They have learned how to correctly write those letters and words…and they become sweet stories that my brave little spellers get to share with each other. It’s truly a beautiful process…and one that I’m always so amazed by.

Before the winter break, I had my class choose a special person to write about. We had been writing about special things…like socks, or toys, or places we’ve been to, and I always like to add in special people too. They got to choose the person, had to draw a picture of them, label them with a ton of words that they sounded out, and then write a sentence about them. I always walk around their desks and help them with sounding out or asking them questions to encourage them to write even more.

On this particular day, I got to one of my student’s desks, and I was way beyond thrilled to see that they had chosen ME to write about! YAY!! Awww….those are the moments a teacher lives for! In my “dreamy teacher floating on a cloud” state, I was so calm on the outside, but inside, there was a HUGE, silent party going on in my head as I knew I had beat out their family members and playground recess besties for this honor!! I saw she had drawn me with big bright eyes and a cute outfit. She labeled my mouth (math), my hair (herr), my desk (dask), my chair (char) and even our computer camera that we use to project onto our active board with! She gave me shoes (sheos) and a flower on my shirt that she labeled as “picster” for picture. But then something confused me a little. I saw she had given me something labeled as “cregls”. When I asked her what that was, she said as if it was obvious, “Cringles!”

Cringles? My mind raced for meaning.

“What are cringles?” I asked. No sooner had I asked this, then my instincts began telling me that was a bad idea. She said, “Those are the lines on your face by your eyes.” She smiled up at me sweetly.

The party in my head was suddenly over.

I instantly felt my age…only much, much older…I felt like I was a hundred years old all of a sudden. Rapunzel’s hair had been cut and Mother Gothel was shriveling up!! Was “cregls” a combination of the words wrinkles and crinkles?? Did it connect me to Kris Kringle’s wife…Mrs. Claus?

I said in my most young-ish sounding Cinderella voice, “OH…you mean the lines by my eyes when I laugh?” Clearly, she must have meant laugh lines…not wrinkles!! We ALL get those, and quite honestly, I do laugh a lot. She just didn’t know what to call them.

(I know…I know… you’re the ones laughing now, right?). 🙂

“No…” she said. “Cringles are the lines here and there” and her sweet little finger waved around in the air to my face where my forehead wrinkles and eye wrinkles are.

I just smiled at her. The truth is, there ARE wrinkles there…or cregls… or whatever you want to call them, it doesn’t matter. They are there…where there once weren’t any. I know because I try to cover them up with makeup in the morning. Aging is happening whether I like it or not. But, I’m blessed by these “cregls” because with them comes 46 years of memories made…special memories. They remind me that life is precious and I am so grateful for the life God has given me. And the truth is, I will be an old lady one day…it’s just a part of living. This sweet student of mine reminded me of how truly blessed I have been…and that aging is in reality a gift.

Before moving on to help another student with their writing, I said to her, “This is really, really, good. I feel so blessed and honored that you chose me to write about” because with or without “cregls”, I am still a kindergarten teacher and in HER eyes, my “cregls” are special. She chose me…and even now, I can hear the party music in my head starting back up again.

I am SO excited to share with you about a miracle I received several weeks ago from the Lord! I wrote down my story in an email and shared it with the pastors at my church. Here it is:

Dear Rock Church,

About six months ago, I started experiencing a painful area in my right breast, and as a woman, felt scared that it could be breast cancer.   Your mind just goes right to the worst scenarios and fear has a way of showing up uninvited right then and there.  I’d been praying for it to heal up, taking God’s word, standing on His promises and daily fighting fear.  But I knew the battle was on.

A little over a week ago I decided to go get a mammogram and the results came back that they had found something and wanted me to come in for further imaging.  I was at work when I got the results and I felt just paralyzed with fear.  I received the call from Kaiser to schedule my imaging appointment for a week later (yesterday), so I had a LONG week of waiting, stress sleep, and praying and fighting and standing on God’s promises.  I have this journal that I write down all my favorite verses in so that in the mornings, I declare them over my life.  Suddenly, the ones on God giving me a long life, a great future, healing, strength, and my enemies being destroyed were suddenly clung to quite a bit more!!  I would feel so full of faith, yet an hour later the fear would creep in and I’d have to say the verses again.  It’s no wonder the Bible calls the word a sword…because it felt like a daily…no, hourly, battle.

You know, it’s funny how God prepares us for things like this.  A few weeks prior to this, I had a dream that I was standing next to a flat screen tv and I was telling someone in the room why I wasn’t afraid of it falling over.  I said “I trust the anchor to hold” (meaning the anchor in the wall) but I woke up thinking, “Jesus…YOU are my anchor.  Do I trust you like I should?”  So began my journey of trust…not knowing how real it was going to get.  Honestly, it also got me changing my thoughts to Jesus’ love for me.  I’d try to just imagine Him holding me.  His perfect love casts out fear and I just wanted to press into His love for me.  Looking back at that dream now, I wonder if that “flat screen” represented my “screening” for breast cancer.  Just a thought.

Saturday night I had another dream about a huge, fat rainbow in the dark night sky and I was rushing out to see this “sign and wonder” in the sky!  I woke up thinking, “God’s promises to me in this dark storm are like rainbows in the dark night sky.”  Then at church, Pastor Zach spoke about “Signs and Wonders”!!  So cool!  But the best part about that Sunday morning was when Pastor Zach had an alter call for those who were hoping and believing for a miracle, but were afraid to believe for it because in the past their miracle didn’t happen (that was ME…as I struggle with believing for God to do a miracle for ME since our first born died in 2005).  Even my husband looked at me with eyes that said, “He’s talking about you.  You better get up there).   I was already planning my route to the front! 🙂

I practically ran up there…I was a little nervous to be the FIRST one up…but thankfully Pastor Jen was there to give me her sweet and reassuring smile, and others eventually came up too…phew! 🙂  I received prayer and an encouraging word from Jen during that time too (thank you Jen!!).  It was Joshua 1:8 about holding on to God’s promises in his word, being strong and courageous and that God would be with me.  How like God to give me encouragement and confirmation once again!!  Talk about a God set up on Sunday morning!  He’s so good!  Thank you Rock Pastors for being so open to hearing from the Lord.  Zach, you mentioned that you had to put this sermon together quick…but it was God’s word to me…how cool of God!!  

Yesterday morning, I went on a run and the song came on by Mercy Me called “Best News Ever” and I felt like God said I’m going to get great news! I clung to that too!

I then went to my Kaiser imaging appointment just CLINGING to God’s promises, and it was the biggest battle to keep my mind on Jesus.  I had three new images taken, and they don’t tell you anything when you’re there.  Then I had to wait 25 minutes (felt like 6 hours) until another nurse came and said they wanted to do an ultrasound!  I was saying things in my head to the sound of “Fear not. Be courageous…” Before she came to get me, I told my mom (who went with me to the appointment,) “Someone is going to tell me that there’s great news!”  I don’t’ know if I said that out of hope or just clinging to the song about best news ever, but I said it.  

The ultrasound technician did a thorough exam and said, “Well, we’re not seeing what we saw on the first image.  Everything looks great and normal!”  Then she said, “I will get the doctor to take a look as well, but I’ll let her give you THE GREAT NEWS!”   She said it!  She actually said that!!!  The doctor also came in to do an ultrasound and said everything looked healthy and normal and that all they saw was just dense breast tissue…nothing more!  The best news ever!

When I got to the waiting room with my mom, and the nurse left, I BURST into thankful, grateful, humbled, messy, loud, and sobby tears!!  “God… oh how YOU love me!  You gave me a miracle and I am forever changed.”   I am OVERWHELMED by His love.  Nothing else matters.  It’s all HIM and to HIM be the glory.   All I did was cling to His promises. I’ve never felt so full of faith and joy…I even started talking about Jesus to the lady at the gas station on the way home!  Ha! Ha!

Thank you, again, Rock Pastors and family for your prayers, and encouragement.  I just couldn’t help but share my testimony with you! 

                                                Tami Pearson

You never know when God is going to speak to you. Sometimes, you ask God to speak and it feels like he’s totally silent. Other times, He shows up at that exact moment when you weren’t even expecting Him to. But it’s the best surprise ever when it happens!

A few weeks ago, I was faced with a health scare that had me shaken…REALLY shaken. In the midst of my “storm” I was praying and doing my best to trust God through it all, but it felt like a daily battle to stand on the promises in His word that I’d be okay. Fear was trying to creep into my every waking moment from the minute I opened my eyes in the morning, to the time they would close at bedtime. I was tired, scared, and trying my best to stay distracted at work. It was a daily…no, it was an hourly battle to keep my mind on Jesus and not be overcome by fear. One moment I’d be full of faith and trust, and the next moment I’d be battling the scary thoughts that would come into my mind. The Bible says that God’s word is a sword…well, that’s clear to me now for I was in a battle.

One evening, we were driving the girls to youth group and Mike was driving the car. We had just gotten off the freeway and were waiting at a stoplight. I had earlier that day downloaded onto my phone a Steven Curtis Chapman song from my teen years called “Way Beyond the Blue”. It’s about God’s plans for your life being SO amazing that they are “way beyond the blue”! It’s a beautiful song that has always taken me to a place of joy, excitement, and the wonderful anticipation of all that God might have in store for my life. It’s funny how one simple song can take you back…back to times when things weren’t crazy, when life was easier, when there weren’t any health scares, and dreams felt like a reality. To me, it’s always felt like one of those songs that made you think of flying…or at least being held in God’s huge hand as you surrender to His safe and loving grasp and He just carries you. In my mind… in the car…getting off the freeway exit… I imagined myself once again in His Hands…and wishing this storm wasn’t a reality.

All of a sudden it was like someone “snapped” their finger in front of my face and I was awake to see what my eyes were looking at. In an INSTANT, I knew God was speaking. It was a “Park and Ride” sign that hung in front of us. I know, I know…this sounds so ridiculous…but I instantly burst into tears! In that tiny little second, God was speaking to me, and literally “giving me a sign”. As my eyes focused on the sign…it was my heart that was coming into focus… on Jesus…and He was telling me to stop driving the weight of this storm myself, to park my “car” and to ride with Him instead. The realization hit me that it’s not me that’s going to get me where I need to be. It’s Him…because He’s the driver…not me. In that moment, on that overpass, God was telling me to “park my car” and hop into His. That I was to trust Him…to “ride” with Him… and to know beyond a shadow of a doubt that He would take care of me.

All of this in a simple “Park and Ride” sign.

And take care of me, He did! I found out a few days later at the doctor’s office that God had healed me. I received a miracle and that blog will come soon. I sobbed in the doctor’s waiting room just overcome by God’s love and His presence with me, and I’ll never be the same again.

God speaks to us. He loves us. He wants us to park…and to ride with Him.

“The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still.” (Exodus 14:14).

I had a dream a few nights ago that I was shopping with a friend and in one arm was a shopping bag and in the other arm was a weight…a barbell! Apparently, in my dream, I wanted to strengthen my arms while I shopped so I was toting around a barbell! I woke up thinking, “Why in the world would I be carrying around a weight while shopping? As if!” But I couldn’t help thinking about my weight-carrying dream…

Yesterday morning, I went on a run. I normally love Saturday morning runs, but I was having a tougher time running against the strong wind that pushed against me that morning. I call these “resistance runs” and they are not fun. More than that though, I think there was an inner struggle I was dealing with, and it took a morning run away from all distractions for me to realize it. It wasn’t until after the first mile that I began to see it.

I talk to God a lot when I run, so I began… “God, I feel heavy-hearted…like I’m carrying around the weight of the world.” A few tears began to sting my eyes at those words, and it became worse as the wind picked up. I had to stop running, to walk and dry the tears so I could see the path in front of me. “I don’t want to cry, God…not now…not on a run.” But I could feel the floodgates beginning to burst. “Oh no,” I thought. Thoughts of everything going on in the world from stuff happening in our government, to thoughts of Covid 19, to everyone in the world who is struggling during this pandemic. There were thoughts of my own daily struggle with the pressures of keeping my class of kindergarteners engaged in distance learning, while making sure my own three kids are doing okay with their struggle to make sense of everything going on. More and more thoughts kept coming and I realized how very much I’d been carrying! Feeling hopeless, I said out loud, “It’s all too much, God…I’m overwhelmed by it all…I can’t carry all of this!” More tears. This was not the normal Saturday run I was used to.

BUT…this part is really cool! 🙂 God is so loving. SO LOVING. Instantly He was right there and He spoke so clearly to my heart as if He’d been waiting for this moment. He LOVES when we pour out our hearts to Him. “Give Me all your cares and worries, because I love you, Tami.” (1 Peter 5:7). I knew in that moment exactly what He was telling me. God did not intend for me to carry all of this. That part was all me.

One, by one, I ran-walked (because I had to continually dry tears with my one very damp kleenex) and I gave Him each thing that was heavy on my heart. I literally listed each one of them, and as I did, it was as if I was unstrapping it from my body, and laying it before him in a huge messy heap! I could feel His smile and His incredible love for me as I did. All the heartbreak over the world’s issues, to my own daily struggles, including every pressure I had put on myself to be the mom, wife, daughter, teacher, friend that everyone needed. There they all were in on giant pile at His feet. When I was done, I felt lighter. I picked up the pace and I began to run again…faster now this time. It seemed I was no longer carrying the weight of the world. 🙂

The dream about the weight came to mind. How funny! God knew. Are you heavy hearted today? Do you feel like you’re carrying a weight around when you should be enjoying life? If so, I’d like to encourage you to give God your cares. He loves you so much.

“Therefore we also, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which so easily ensnares us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking unto Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith, who for the joy that was set before Him endured the cross…”

I was listening to a song today that took me back to a time about five years ago when we were living in Brentwood. The song is called “It is Well” and you can listen to it here: https://safeYouTube.net/w/hjHZ . I love this song! It speaks about how no matter what storm in life we may be facing…Jesus still calms the wind and the waves. In fact I love the part in the song where it says, “The waves and wind still know HIS name!” Five years ago, we were in a life “storm” and in that season, I played this song over and over again to remind myself that Jesus was going to calm it and see us through. I was scared, worried, disappointed in our circumstances…yet trying to focus on the possibility that God had something good in store. And you know what? He did.

Looking back…I see that He not only calmed our storm, but He brought about countless blessings in our lives. New doors opened up for us and we’ve seen such awesome things happen in our lives since then. It’s really quite a cool story!

But lately, I have forgotten that….and if I’m going to be completely honest, I have been “looking back” in a different way.

Last March, Covid 19 came in like a storm and it hit us all hard…and along with it, having to shelter in place, wear a mask everywhere we go, social distancing from our loved ones, learning how to teach and be taught via distance learning… all while making sure my kids are doing okay with it all. Then there came the California wildfires and the possibility of evacuations, unhealthy smoke in the air, people divided with such political chaos in our country, and watching my friends lose their jobs and their businesses…it has been so sad. It’s been unsettling for everyone…that’s for sure…and I have become lost in all of it. The job I absolutely love has become ten times harder and has left me exhausted with little time for my own family (except that I absolutely love my amazing bunch of kindergarteners to pieces). I have seen so many people around me feeling overwhelmed and depressed and I’ve felt so helpless to fix it all. My own kids are struggling with not being able to be with their friends or do normal things like before, and although we are trying to count our many blessings…we’re just so bummed to have lost so much wonderful “normal” that we used to enjoy. This storm feels like it will never end!!!

But in it all…I have forgotten THE ONE who calms the storms. I have been “looking back”…but not to the miracles I have seen God do for us in the past…but to what life used to be like. I keep catching myself dreaming of when we lived in San Ramon and I was a stay at home mom with my kids doing arts and crafts with them when they were so little. I keep remembering how life was when we lived in Brentwood and when we first moved into the house we loved so much. I keep looking back to when I had all the time in the world (and a messy house of toys) to spend on the floor playing with my kids. I keep remembering so many of the good memories of the PAST. I keep looking back…

Then it struck me. I’m looking back just like Lot’s wife did when she saw what she thought was a better life burning to the ground and it was then that she turned into a pillar of salt. She didn’t grasp hold of the fact that God had this amazing blessing ahead of her if she would just keep walking forward and trusting God. There was this future ahead of her that she should have been looking toward. Instead she looked back. Yipes!

“God”, I said, “you might as well call me “salt lady”!” Yep. I actually said that. I say weird things like that to God…often. He gets me. 🙂

“I’m no better than her. I’m looking back at the times that were good in my life, because the days that we are in NOW are just SO HARD and it feels like they keep getting worse! I think there was even an earthquake that hit the Bay Area today! Seriously?

Looking back.

When the song “It is Well” came on today, it’s like someone turned the light on…and I could feel the tears stinging my eyes. I suddenly remembered what God had done for us in that stormy season when this song had become my prayer.

“God, I’m not looking back anymore. I’m looking FORWARD to all the good things I KNOW you have ahead.

I’m reminded of something really cool that Paul in the Bible said. He said, “I’ve learned by now to be quite content whatever my circumstances. I’m just as happy with little as with much, with much as with little. I’ve found the recipe for being happy whether full or hungry, hands full or hands empty. Whatever I have, wherever I am, I can make it through anything in the One who makes me who I am.”

Paul was beaten repeatedly, imprisoned often, shipwrecked, bitten by a viper, continually put on trial for his faith…and yet he can say that he’s found out how to be content? Is it possible his joy is not found in his circumstances???

Paul’s source of joy and contentment was found in one place…Jesus. His focus was on the love of God. He was complete in Him and no matter what went on around him…he was content because He knew God loved him.

I’ve decided that I’m looking ahead now. I can’t wait to see what God has in store. His plans are always beyond our wildest dreams…He loves us THAT much! In God’s usual way, He used something so simple as the reminder of a song today to speak to me. I feel refreshed and renewed and ready to face the storm because I know where my joy lies…it’s in Him. He loves me and He’s with me.